Dear Dr. Archer,
I'm a male model and a super hot 26 year old. I've done extensive national and international work, and all the girls love me. My problem is whether I accept some of these older women's offers to set me up in style and take care of me. Some have even offered to marry me.
I'm a romantic, and think perhaps one day I'll find true love. But it's very difficult when every girl I meet wants to hook up. No one realizes how hard it is to be a gorgeous guy and find a regular girl. My agent and manager have to screen everyone because they're afraid of the psycho girls.
I know I shouldn't complain, but anyway, do you have any advice? Peace, Doc.
I'm all for building self esteem, but you've taken it to a new level. Sounds like you're already in love...... unfortunately, with yourself.
Physical appearance, initially, will get you looks and stares, but it won't get you far in relationships because eventually you must speak. If you're an overbearing egomaniac, the attraction will eventually stop in it's tracks.
There's a huge difference between being confident in yourself and being cocky. Confident is good. Cocky? Hmmmm, not so good. Women want what men want -- brains, a good disposition, sense of humor, empathy, a giving nature and a trusted mate.
Looks come and go with time, and will not provide any of these traits, I don't care how gorgeous you are, JJK. As Benjamin Franklin said, "Beauty and folly are old companions."
Take Brad Pitt and George Clooney as two examples. Two men who, by anybody's standards, are very good looking men. And yet, they do not shine the spotlight on themselves.
They work for the good of the neglected, those in need or without. They're caring human beings, who try to make a difference in the world. This makes them very appealing, looks and all.
Whether you take up the offers of women to set you up in style will determine just what sort of a person you are. Do you take advantage of lonely women? Can you be bought?
Just as you place so much value on physical beauty, you must realize others do, too. It just won't last, JJK, all youthful beauty fades with time.
Plus, if you're as awesome as you say, you should be making enough cash to set yourself up in style, and not have to depend on some lonely old lady.
My advice: Forget about your looks, focus on making a difference in the world, stop taking advantage of older, wealthy women and date when you find someone you like and admire.
I promise 20 years from now, when the looks are fading, you will be glad you did. You just might discover some hidden traits within that you are really proud of, other than your looks. How cool would that be? Take care.